Cubs Sign Kim DeJesus' Husband To A 2-Year Deal

photo via @KimDeJesus12 (hope that's ok, Kim)

Kim DeJesus' already lucky husband got a little more fortunate today when he signed a 2 year contract with the Chicago Cubs worth 10 million dollars.

Kim's spouse spent 8 seasons with the Kansas City Royals and one - last season - with the Oakland A's. He has a .284 career batting average; hitting a total of 207 doubles, 50 triples, 71 home runs and 436 RBI. He also has a .356 on-base percentage, and a smoking hot wife.

 

The Cubs will introduce Mrs. DeJesus' significant other at a press conference from Wrigley Field tomorrow at 11 am. No word as of yet if Kim, a lifelong Cubs fan from Wheaton, Illinos, will be in attendance. (Hope so) 

 

Go Cubbies!

 

Star Wars Night At Wrigley Field? With only one homestand left, Cubs pulling out all the stops

The Chicago Cubs need to average a little over 32,000 fans a day over their final 6 game homestand to reach their magic 3 million attendance figure. Well sir, it appears the boys over at marketing are pulling out all the stops to make certain it happens

First you've got Friday's game which they've dubbed: "Music Night" where they say they'll let something called "loopt" hand out "FREE Song Downloads from Today’s Hottest Artists!" Whatever the hell that means. Funny thing is: Music Night is during a DAY game, and even more hilarious is the fact that the "first 40,000 fans" will get these songs. They'll be lucky to have 30,000 actual people show up.

 

On Sunday the 18th they're having "Star Wars Night" - again, during a DAY game - where you can "watch the Cubs use the Force" against the Houston Astros. 

Come again?

 

The kicker is that this thing won't be free for the first 40,000 fans. This thing costs money. "JUST $50 includes a special Cubs "Use the Force for Good" Star Wars t-shirt and a Bleacher Box ticket in the special Star Wars section, where you can enjoy the game with fellow fans. During the game, you'll be treated to appearances from some of your favorite Star Wars characters!"

 

I'd be willing to bet an Old Style that this Bleacher Box section will be more interested in starting The Wave than watching the game

 

Cubs vs Cardinals: Two Teams Not Making The Playoffs

This afternoon the Chicago Cubs (54-70) host the St. Louis Cardinals (66-58) at beautiful Wrigley Field.

Took a gander at the standings in the paper this morning and I see here that the Cards are 6 1/2 games out of 1st as well as the Wild Card. Now, I don't typically take pleasure in another teams misfortune, but it is good to know that just like our Cubs - the Cardinals look to be watching the playoffs from their couches.

 

Oh and by the way, The Cubs fired GM Jim Hendry this morning.

Go Cubs

With Astros in Town, Cubs Can Only Win for Losing

The Cubs set to welcome our equally inferior foes from the Lone Star State

Your crummy Chicago Cubs (39-60) host the only slightly more crummy Houston Astros (33-65) this afternoon at lovely Wrigley Field. It is a battle for the basement as the teams with the two worst records in the entire Major Leagues face off for three games under the sun.

I had my brother Harold do a little research about the Cubs and their history of finishing dead last in the MLB. To our surprise it has only happened ONCE since they started handing out the top draft pick to the biggest loser back in '65. The year for the Cubs was '81 (which was a strange, strike shortened year) and the result of our achievement in paltry play was the drafting of good ol' Shawon Dunston in '82.

With very little to root for this year, perhaps it is time to hope for a continuation of our losing ways. Maybe a complete and utter tanking will bring about some much needed change to this god-awful team. 

Say What You Will: Nobody No-Hits The Cubs

Few would argue the Chicago Cubs past to be triumphant. Besides those championships back in '07 and '08 (I'm talking 1900's here) it's been a pretty bleak century. We've all witnessed a heckuva lot more losing than winning, but one thing you haven't witnessed too often is the Cubs being No-Hit. Sure we lose, but we usually get at least one hit.

In fact, the Cubs hold the Major League record for consecutive games played without being No-Hit. The last time it happened was back on September 9, 1965 when old Sandy Koufax tossed a perfect game. That is a streak of 7,228 games (if my math is correct) and is more than 200 game better than any other team in the history of Major League Baseball.

In unrelated news: Roy Halladay is set to pitch against the Cubs tonight.

In Need of a Lossless Homestand; Cubs Return to Wrigley

Fresh off of a 2 and 4 road trip, your Chicago Cubs (31-46) return home to Wrigley Field today to take on the Colorado Rockies (38-39) for a 1 game series. This here game is making up a rain-out from April 27th. 

After today our boys have 4 games vs the San Francisco Giants and 3 vs the Southside White Sox.

As long as the Cubs win 7 or 8 outta 8 we should be ok.

Go Cubs.

Wrigley Ready for the Goll Darn Yankees

Your Chicago Cubs (28-40) are set to welcome the darn New York Yankees (27 world championships) to beautiful Wrigley Field for a three game series. 

The last time these boys faced one another here was in 2003. Boy, that was a memorable series. It featured match-ups of Wells vs Zambrano, Clemens vs Wood and Pettitte vs Prior - with our boys in blue taking 2 outta 3.

I recall sitting in the bleachers during that Wood vs Clemens, Saturday affair. It was just a beautiful day for baseball. The Rocket was going for his 300th win and he darn near had it - leaving the game in the 7th with a 1-0 lead. But thanks to Juan Acevedo serving up a 3 run shot to Eric Karros, that victory went to our Kid K. Now, you see, Karros was only in the game because of a freak injury to good ol Hee Seop Choi. In the 4th Choi and Wood bumped into one another on a pop-up and somehow our first basemen ended up down for the count. It is still the only time I recall seeing an ambulance on the field. 

Anywho, Go Cubs Go!

Well What Do We Have Here?

Well I'll be. 

Looks like our prediction of Wrigley Field being turned into Miller Park South weren't too off, but our expectations for our team were. Your Chicago Cubs just took 3 outta 4 against the Milwaukee Brewers.

Damn Hell You Say!

Bring On The Bucks

The Chicago Cubs (22-26) host those pesky Pittsburgh Pirates (22-26) on what looks to be a dandy Friday afternoon at Wrigley Field.

Go Cubs

Wrigley Welcomes the Mets

Your 5th place Chicago Cubs (20-25) are set to host the New York Mets (22-24) tonight at beautiful Wrigley Field. 

Our boys in blue will play 3 a piece against the Mets, Pirates and Astros. Now I'd say with this many games vs teams in our own division - sub par teams at that - this homestand figures to be quite pivotal. 

Let's get some wins, boys!

Wrigley Field Back To Her Old Self Again

Player Banners Are Gone

They took down the Opening Day clutter from around the glorious Wrigley Field Marquee earlier today, nearly returning the Stadium to her old self.

The last two years they've tried to gussy up the place at season's start by hanging giant photographs of Cubs players here and there, and thankfully - just like last year - those same photographs have come back down after a mid-May homestand.

Who knows, maybe getting rid of this junk can somehow lead to an improvement of their current 9-13 home record.

Cubs Homestand Postview

Sunday's finale postponed due to weather

Well sir, The Chicago Cubs leave town today after a rather lousy homestand. The weather was lousy and so was the team.

The Cubs mustered only one win in each of the series vs the Cardinals, Reds and Giants; losing 5 out of 8.

The average attendance was 35,431 and the average temperature was more suitable for football. To top things off, the Sunday game vs San Fransisco was postponed until June 28th due to rain and temps in the 40's.

If There's Grass On The Field . . .

Play Ball!

Wrigley Field Tours Begin

More signs of a return for Chicago Cubs Baseball.
Today, they began running fan tours of an empty - and cold - Wrigley Field. I try to take in a tour at least once a season. I tell you what, there is just something almost more beautiful and powerful about this place when she is empty.

Twitter friend Brian Bernardoni updated everyone with some dandy photographs and some even dandier words:

The scoreboard and the seats are empty for now, and the fans who will travel to see her aren't here. . . But, she is here. And she is getting herself ready for the new season.
She doesn't primp nor pose. She is steady and strong. Since 1914 millions have come to be part of this piece of hallowed ground which preserves Americana and our National Pastime. . .

Well done @BrianBernardoni, Well Done!